Where in the name of Theda Bara did Aaron land this time? The room was black and smelled of bad crotch, fizzy beer, sewer rats, and cigarette butts. Men filled the room like a sardine can. They groped at his chest and grazed his hips. They talked in a hilly English that put him somewhere between Punxsutawny and Dubuque. Dear God, Aaron hoped he didn’t land in Punxsutawny to see the groundhog not see his shadow for the tenth year running.
But the men were dressed in heavy jackets and jeans, at least those whose pants weren’t down around their ankles. Aaron could see better now that his pupils dilated. They all had beards. Was it a gay Paul Bunyan reunion? He didn’t mind traveling to a cliché gay locale back in the ‘70s. How else to explain the pocketed red scarves? After all, Aaron enjoyed men and women in the same frisky way. But he did mind the cheap beer. He’d rather sit at 21 sipping martinis with Noel Coward.
A short wiry type named Bruce came over and offered him a Rolling Rock, said he liked Aaron’s nose. Who likes people’s noses? And when he introduced himself, Bruce burst out laughing – “Aardvark, yeah right buddy. Total aardvark nose there. Hey fellas, listen to this guy, he’s got an aardvark nose.”
Aaron wanted to punch out Bruce’s face but held back. Why’d his family have to come from Slovenia and give him that name? For years he’d considered changing his name to Aaron Avalon, but it didn’t flow off the tongue like Aaron Aardvark. But no, he just laughed along with this Midwestern fool. He’d probably end up in an HIV ward ten years later.
Then it hit Aaron, that’s why they transported him here. Part of the deal, once a month they choose where he’d land. He came here to warn them. So he picked up Bruce and went back to his place behind the mill and enjoyed the romp, even if the mattress lay on the floor between kitty litter and a shotgun collection. But when Aaron warned Bruce about what was coming, he said he was out of his mind, get the hell out of here, don’t come back.
Where were Mr. Coward and his 21 martini?
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