Bureaucratic

“May I use some extra towels, please?” Jonathan said at the Hampton Inn counter.ç “We only provide towels to registered guests, sir,” the young woman said, her lips pursed and her eyes like marbles.

“I’ll pay for them. It’s an emergency. I’m driving from Dallas and my cat soiled the cage – and himself. I need to clean up the mess.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” she said, her expression like stone. “We have no way we could sell you some towels. They’re for our paying guests.”

“How much is a room for a night?”

“Would you like to make a reservation? You will need to call our reservations hotline and use our automated customer service menus.”

“You can’t make the reservation directly for me?”

“I’m afraid not. Company policy, you know. The number is 800-SCREW-YOU.”

Fifteen minutes later, Jonathan had a reservation for a king-sized non-smoking room with free Wireless Internet at $82.99 per night plus tax and fees. He went back to the front desk.

“All right, I have a reservation for a room. I’m checking in.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” the woman said. “Check-in isn’t until 4:00 p.m.”

“But that’s only twenty minutes away. Do you have any rooms available?”

“Let me check with housekeeping,” she said, picking up the phone. Ten minutes later, she hung up. “Yes, we have a room at the far end of the top floor.”

She checked him in and then handed him the keys. “But of course, you do know, we don’t allow pets in the rooms.”