Agnes hadn't gotten beyond the second measure of "L'isle Joyeuse" before Brian baritoned his "Wrong!" and did one of his collapsing expressions, glasses twisted on his face and tongue hanging out the left side of his mouth. Agnes couldn't help but laugh. Brian playing facial games and poking fun at her piano playing always amused her, especially when she was trying to master a really difficult piece.
Debussy must've had really thin fingers, because the music he wrote always seemed to happen in the space of half an inch. All those fast notes, so close together on the piano. With her big paws, thick fingers, and her killer thumb (that's what Brian called it), she had to admit, Debussy just killed her, practice though she might.
"Let's try it again, Agnes ... this time give it some sexiness. Like you're getting the best lay in the world. Even from Norman!"
Brian was always playing the sex card with her piano playing. The way he talked, you'd have thought the piano was a sex toy, a way for Brian to seduce women. Oh, wait a minute -- a way for Brian to seduce men. How could she forget? It was one of his most endearing qualities.
"Let's go to the ending now and make me cream my pants."
Oh, Brian, please, the children are upstairs! Norman had only been dead six months, Brian had moved in just four months ago, Grace was upstairs reading "Little Women" and Harold was playing with his toy cars, and Victoria sat in the parlor, knitting a sweater for Grace. Agnes worried about Victoria. Her mother-in-law sat alone in the parlor, knitting, too many hours of the day. She hadn't really gotten over Norman being killed in the London bombing.
Back to Brian and "Isle of Joy." Okay, she'd give him an orgasm at the end of this piece. Hopefully, she wouldn't also blow the roof off the house. That'd be expensive.
--
James M. Wood
Author, "The Grace of Agnes Limerick" (available Spring 2012)
Four Seasons 206
Fort Lauderdale, FL 33301
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